For My Brother

It has been very subtly brought to my attention that I’ve been slacking off on updating my Sign Blog. That may be true… I’ve been slacking off on a lot of things lately. For now, I’m not going to try to keep up with the sign blog, but I do find so many good signs, I can’t not post them. So I’ll just put them here. Stay tuned.

Here’s three good ones from recently. Dedicated to Tommy.

“NO THONGS Except on Feet”

This gem comes from Pier 39 in San Francisco. I definitely appreciate the regulation, especially since I think the picture on their sign shows a little more coverage than a tiny thong in a fat world actually provides.

“SATAN 08: the lesser of three evils”

Hahahaha!! I think this is really funny. It was stuck to a garbage can, also in San Francisco. Disclaimer: this is not my personal opinion.

One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn’t belong,
Can you tell which thing is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?

And finally, what might be the funniest sign in the history of ever:

Do you get it?? Hold on, let me give you a close up:

“Street Cleaning: All Vehicles Off Street, Or Will Be Towed.”

Seriously dude. Someone scrubbed that street WAY too hard.

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Send Me A Sign! No really… please?

I have started a new blog. I have a deep love of things that are silly – when they’re meant to be, but especially when they aren’t. One of the best places to find such silliness is along the sides of the road. People put the most incredible things on billboards!

Once I started thinking about it, I realized that signs are great in so many different ways. They announce, advertise, remind, plead, and inform. Working for an advertising company, I know how difficult it can be to come up with something really clever, and how valuable. More often than not, though, it’s the people who aren’t trying to be witty who do the best job.

So I’ve decided to celebrate signs. I’ve created a blog that will be solely dedicated to posting the good ones that I find, either personally or elsewhere online. There are a few sites I’ve found that apparently started with this goal in mind, but most seem to have gone defunct. Eventually, I hope to have other people send in their signs as well, and I’ll post ‘em all.

To start, I’ll put up one sign a day. So go check it out, and come back again tomorrow! Wheee!

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The Mile High Club is Closed

I flew to Denver last weekend to help my folks get ready for a move to Washington D.C. Flights from Rapid City to Denver are often on planes that are less big than, say, a breadbox. You can feel all the parts moving together and you’re happy to be assigned to the side of the aisle with only one seat because then you’re not stuck playing Knee Hockey with the extra-long-legged guy in the seat next to you.

Anyway. This particular flight was just fine. I somehow got seated in the front row, which meant unlimited leg room. It also meant no tray, but what can you do?

The most interesting thing about this flight was the lighted sign that kept flashing on and off right in front of my seat:

Before I explain what I thought about this sign, I should point out that this flight left the airport at 6:00am, and I had been awake since 4:30. Also, the flight was one of the more turbulent flights I’ve ever been on. The attendant spent a fair portion of it seated and strapped in.

So on this sign we have a man and a sink and a mirror and a woman. The sign clearly has something to do with men and women in a bathroom, right? Since not one single passenger ever got out of his or her seat, no one was using the bathroom and so the sign was apparently turning on and off at random. It was, therefore, not a “bathroom occupied” sign.

The remaining (and obvious) conclusion was that it must be a Mile High Club sign. “Stay in your seats, you would-be extreme lovers. Sex in an airplane bathroom is dangerous under normal circumstances, but with all this bouncing around, we’re pretty sure you’d lose a tooth or break a shin and we don’t want to be held liable.”

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